Saturday, May 23, 2015
Saturday, March 7, 2015
Say this prayer ...... reject grudges!!! Amen.
Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be ...
Dear Holy Trinity ... remove the temptations
of Satan from my life path ... but, thy will be done.
I fear for my soul, and wrath is not
what you want for me. Remove all
grudges from me ... now and
forever. Amen. Anon.
Monday, March 2, 2015
Helen Keller ......... prayers in the dark :)
Imagine you will being born in the dark, and not being able to hear! That would be hell enough. But, for Helen Keller it was true! She lived a life without either sound or light, and for several years of her life was considered stupid, by those who thought she was unreachable. The standards of the time, as can be seen in the movie Harvey (with Jimmy Stewart) made life for those mentally disturbed and deemed 'unreachable' a living hell. But, luckily Helen had her Anne Sullivan.
Now, think about the more 'realistic' case ... the cases we forget about ... 'the forgotten'! Think about the fact that not only is someone being abused right now, but that some child who is blind and deaf is being abused to the point of numbness ... no feeling! The hell that it must be in that darkness, a numbing darkness with no one but the HOLY SPIRIT to communicate with ... no one but the HOLY SPIRIT communicating with them!!! I am begging you, to pray with me for this intention right now. That their suffering be ended, and their tormentors caught ...
(silent prayer)
(or local 911)
AMEN!! ANON!!
Sunday, March 1, 2015
Let all those without Sin ... the real meaning :)
Remember when the Pharisees were about to stone the woman in the bible? It was a horrible scene. This time the biblical Pharisees were trying to get Jesus confused, possibly enough to stone the woman who, in their opinion, had 'broken the law'. To put it simply, Jesus started writing in the sand the sins of the very men (and we should realize possibly, women) who wanted to see this victim stoned. "Let those without sin cast the first stone." By his actions Jesus stopped the stoning. He then told the woman to 'go, and sin no more'. Forgiveness!
Time and time again when confronted with the sins of prostitutes and tax collectors reflected upon the greater sins of those who would carry out the execution, those very Pharisees and Sadducees. When told that fateful time about sexual sins he reflected back at the Pharisees accusing him that 'anyone who lusts for a woman in his heart has already sinned". I had a tough time with this one for two reasons:(1) how about the women who lust for men (or anyone for that matter) and (2) how could I be attracted to women without the sexual component. But, the answer to the question as always lay in just WHO Jesus was talking to. How could the message at one time be 'Be Fruitful and Multiply' and then ... well, stop multiplying! The question is answered by WHO the message is for! I stopped about 25 years ago as an undergraduate to search my soul for my religious center. I then remembered my teachings from the seminary. I remembered that society was vastly different 2000-4000 years ago. There were two classes: slaves and free. The free were many times the rich, the royal, and those who had to fight for their rights ... variations on a militaristic theme. They were the soldiers, centurions, and even more upper class military members from Spartan-like societies. And, as we fail to note so often, there were the failures .... the losers of those ancient battles who would in later centuries become vassals, maid servants, and butlers. They were originally, however, slaves. No high school, no college, no community schools, and as bad as it was for boys it was worse for girls. Feel what I'm about to say carefully: in modern day terms the choices were bleak for males being either shepherd or (professional killer) centurion. Females literally lived in an ancient hell of continuous prostitution from birth .... again slaves; many were of royal birth, or of some importance, This is why female saints are revered from Joan of Arc to Mother Theresa. I am male from the modern era and in my ignorance sex is just sex to me. It took me a long time to make myself think of the hell that is inherited femininity for my human 'sisters'. Jesus was far ahead of his time, and speaking definitely for our benefit as men to acknowledge the female plight. When I think of sex, women ARE EXPERIENCING SLAVERY TODAY!!! I DO UNDERSTAND THAT!!!
I emulate and actuate the male sexual hero, and women cannot tell the difference between Lex Luthor and Clark Kent (Supermen), because from dating the real actors they have a totally different experience. HOW WOULD I KNOW THAT BEING STRAIGHT-HETEROSEXUAL????
Finally, Jesus faced his own accusers not with hatred, but with a love that finally testified that 'the son of man' would be seen arriving on a cloud, ironically not unlike Superman. But, the superman that most women would want is a far cry from what most men would portray. In any case, the consistent thing about both Jesus and Superman is ....... Mercy! Forgiveness! It's the thing that makes modern day heroes different from the merciless tyrants of the past. We've come to the point now that if a doomsday mechanism were put together it would literally destroy both sides of the planet. Then, who wins? Who casts that stone now? Amen. Anon.
Time and time again when confronted with the sins of prostitutes and tax collectors reflected upon the greater sins of those who would carry out the execution, those very Pharisees and Sadducees. When told that fateful time about sexual sins he reflected back at the Pharisees accusing him that 'anyone who lusts for a woman in his heart has already sinned". I had a tough time with this one for two reasons:(1) how about the women who lust for men (or anyone for that matter) and (2) how could I be attracted to women without the sexual component. But, the answer to the question as always lay in just WHO Jesus was talking to. How could the message at one time be 'Be Fruitful and Multiply' and then ... well, stop multiplying! The question is answered by WHO the message is for! I stopped about 25 years ago as an undergraduate to search my soul for my religious center. I then remembered my teachings from the seminary. I remembered that society was vastly different 2000-4000 years ago. There were two classes: slaves and free. The free were many times the rich, the royal, and those who had to fight for their rights ... variations on a militaristic theme. They were the soldiers, centurions, and even more upper class military members from Spartan-like societies. And, as we fail to note so often, there were the failures .... the losers of those ancient battles who would in later centuries become vassals, maid servants, and butlers. They were originally, however, slaves. No high school, no college, no community schools, and as bad as it was for boys it was worse for girls. Feel what I'm about to say carefully: in modern day terms the choices were bleak for males being either shepherd or (professional killer) centurion. Females literally lived in an ancient hell of continuous prostitution from birth .... again slaves; many were of royal birth, or of some importance, This is why female saints are revered from Joan of Arc to Mother Theresa. I am male from the modern era and in my ignorance sex is just sex to me. It took me a long time to make myself think of the hell that is inherited femininity for my human 'sisters'. Jesus was far ahead of his time, and speaking definitely for our benefit as men to acknowledge the female plight. When I think of sex, women ARE EXPERIENCING SLAVERY TODAY!!! I DO UNDERSTAND THAT!!!
I emulate and actuate the male sexual hero, and women cannot tell the difference between Lex Luthor and Clark Kent (Supermen), because from dating the real actors they have a totally different experience. HOW WOULD I KNOW THAT BEING STRAIGHT-HETEROSEXUAL????
Finally, Jesus faced his own accusers not with hatred, but with a love that finally testified that 'the son of man' would be seen arriving on a cloud, ironically not unlike Superman. But, the superman that most women would want is a far cry from what most men would portray. In any case, the consistent thing about both Jesus and Superman is ....... Mercy! Forgiveness! It's the thing that makes modern day heroes different from the merciless tyrants of the past. We've come to the point now that if a doomsday mechanism were put together it would literally destroy both sides of the planet. Then, who wins? Who casts that stone now? Amen. Anon.
Friday, February 27, 2015
The case of the 'SOMETIMES NEED A HUSBAND/MAN" --FAMILY ... THE ANTIMALES!! :)
I know of the case of a family so passionate about 1960's type Roe vs. Wade stances that they've got themselves a little problem. The truth of the matter is that women in the past centuries were treated like crap, got stuck with the children while the men played around sexually with just anyone. Generation after generation this created a resentment in the female population until the last generation produced that barn house of 10+ children I've spoken about in previous blogs. Well, the oldest females took the very understandable stance, like their spinster Aunt (their selected female 'matriarch') not to be baby creating factories like their female ancestors were. Fine and good, so far.
However, here in lay the problem! The males of the family being of the same stock as their fathers went into overdrive, screwing everything in sight! In fact, I was there to see the battle of the sexes that broke up their family sending female relatives flying in all directions with male relatives 'inheriting' the home they lived in with the aunt, but doing absolutely nothing to pay for it, doing nothing but getting drunk, going to jail, and raising male and female babies to do the same thing.
Times and crimes past by and the arguing subsided, but the tension between the genders has never let up, and the house itself without the previous generations patriarchs became a drinking spot for the whole neighborhood. The aunt holds her side of the spinster bargain inheriting the 'boss' status from her mother, but being a spinster from the spinster generation she was the first one to declare that no male hands were necessary in her life. Thus, feel this picture: what exactly is this sh*t!? Add to that, as already mentioned "CRIMINALS, THE NEXT GENERATION!" and their sometimes parents frequenting the house! Let's add 'race' to the mix as is played in Louisiana and realize that because of their complexion (red/medium light skinned) they could chew the fat with the White/European neighbors without letting on that they were in fact criminals. Oh, but a dime was dropped on every 'black nigger' that the whites would buy as suspects in crimes. And, in fact, that's what is going on all over the country, but especially in POST KATRINA NEW ORLEANS! Racists just looking for any excuse to COLORIZE CRIME BLACK while at the same time passing by the light skinned and white criminal riff raff.
So, now enters "Jack", a normal red blooded American Heterosexual male. Poor Jack doesn't realize how hurt the situation is and goes around flagrantly flexing muscles, making heterosexual innuendoes, and being a general pain .... although no one says it for years, the ones left in the situation. Unbeknownst to the female relatives who've fled the situation Jack is quite the artist and CAN SEE THROUGH CLOTHES!! HE HAS A VERY HEALTHY SEXUAL IMAGINATION, HAS ENGAGED WITH FEMALES SENSUALLY AS NORMAL MALES DO, AND EVEN DREW HIS OWN NUDEY MAGAZINE IN DETAIL FOR ALL TO SEE! SO, EVERYONE WHO REALLY KNOWS JACK KNOWS ABOUT HIS NUDE FIXATION AS A YOUNGER MAN ANYWAY! ALL KNOW ABOUT THIS EXCEPT FOR THE FEMALE RELATIVES WHO MOVED AWAY!!!
Now, let's update to the modern OJ times, the Rodney King times, a time of neo Jim Crow trying to assert itself in a world that is 50 shades of Grew (for brighter skinned people) and all things Will and Grace and Ellen and Oprah, etc. but, women who scream rape at the sighting of a dark skinned man they may in fact actually be attracted to. Jack has ignored racism his whole life, especially sexually dating women of many skin colors, religions, and backgrounds. Then, there were those 2 years that Jack got a lap dance every other day of the week on Bourbon Street before he realized how stupid that was, for several reasons. He then wised up, and started to make car note payments instead of paying stippers (of which he could tell you the stage names of every one of them on Bourbon Street, even having a fake name of his own) , and even moved into his own apartment paying rent for a while instead of paying stippers. He thought himself quite the man. But, he knew he had a problem. Why wasn't he able to keep an actual girlfriend ... a real woman?
To make a long story short, Jack allowed Jesus to run his life ... finally. He gave up Bourbon Street, the strippers, even cybering online and, of course, the porn. Which is why it strikes him every time a woman of a certain type considers him to be sexually wrong. He has approached me about the problem, the barn house female situation, and one oldest sister in particular who ran away from taking care of that nest of crime only to cry 'rape' in a way every time she encounters him. Jack is pushing 50, has been a professional athlete, is an expert marksman (256 on the gun range), has been a security guard, but has never had a serious relationship with a woman. But, the one thing I remind him of is the fact that he is not responsible for the barn yard household. They drew their lots, had their fight, and if that older sister of that family who ran away has a problem then SHE SHOULD BE REPORTED!!! There are those in that house who work at the grocery, but EAT THE AUNT OUT OF HOUSE AND HOME, REFUSE TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE, AND LAY AROUND ALL DAY STILL DRINKING ALL DAY!!! IF IT WEREN'T FOR JACK GOING TO GET GROCERIES THEN THE AUNT WOULD BE SICK AND STARVE!!! BIG SISTER REFUSES TO SEE THAT FACT, MAKING COMMENTARIES ONLINE ABOUT CLOSING MCDONALD'S DOWN, ATTACKING BIG OIL AND EVEN THE CATHOLIC CHURCH DAILY!!! SHE HAS A BIG PROBLEM, AND TOO MUCH ON HER PLATE!!!
However, here in lay the problem! The males of the family being of the same stock as their fathers went into overdrive, screwing everything in sight! In fact, I was there to see the battle of the sexes that broke up their family sending female relatives flying in all directions with male relatives 'inheriting' the home they lived in with the aunt, but doing absolutely nothing to pay for it, doing nothing but getting drunk, going to jail, and raising male and female babies to do the same thing.
Times and crimes past by and the arguing subsided, but the tension between the genders has never let up, and the house itself without the previous generations patriarchs became a drinking spot for the whole neighborhood. The aunt holds her side of the spinster bargain inheriting the 'boss' status from her mother, but being a spinster from the spinster generation she was the first one to declare that no male hands were necessary in her life. Thus, feel this picture: what exactly is this sh*t!? Add to that, as already mentioned "CRIMINALS, THE NEXT GENERATION!" and their sometimes parents frequenting the house! Let's add 'race' to the mix as is played in Louisiana and realize that because of their complexion (red/medium light skinned) they could chew the fat with the White/European neighbors without letting on that they were in fact criminals. Oh, but a dime was dropped on every 'black nigger' that the whites would buy as suspects in crimes. And, in fact, that's what is going on all over the country, but especially in POST KATRINA NEW ORLEANS! Racists just looking for any excuse to COLORIZE CRIME BLACK while at the same time passing by the light skinned and white criminal riff raff.
So, now enters "Jack", a normal red blooded American Heterosexual male. Poor Jack doesn't realize how hurt the situation is and goes around flagrantly flexing muscles, making heterosexual innuendoes, and being a general pain .... although no one says it for years, the ones left in the situation. Unbeknownst to the female relatives who've fled the situation Jack is quite the artist and CAN SEE THROUGH CLOTHES!! HE HAS A VERY HEALTHY SEXUAL IMAGINATION, HAS ENGAGED WITH FEMALES SENSUALLY AS NORMAL MALES DO, AND EVEN DREW HIS OWN NUDEY MAGAZINE IN DETAIL FOR ALL TO SEE! SO, EVERYONE WHO REALLY KNOWS JACK KNOWS ABOUT HIS NUDE FIXATION AS A YOUNGER MAN ANYWAY! ALL KNOW ABOUT THIS EXCEPT FOR THE FEMALE RELATIVES WHO MOVED AWAY!!!
Now, let's update to the modern OJ times, the Rodney King times, a time of neo Jim Crow trying to assert itself in a world that is 50 shades of Grew (for brighter skinned people) and all things Will and Grace and Ellen and Oprah, etc. but, women who scream rape at the sighting of a dark skinned man they may in fact actually be attracted to. Jack has ignored racism his whole life, especially sexually dating women of many skin colors, religions, and backgrounds. Then, there were those 2 years that Jack got a lap dance every other day of the week on Bourbon Street before he realized how stupid that was, for several reasons. He then wised up, and started to make car note payments instead of paying stippers (of which he could tell you the stage names of every one of them on Bourbon Street, even having a fake name of his own) , and even moved into his own apartment paying rent for a while instead of paying stippers. He thought himself quite the man. But, he knew he had a problem. Why wasn't he able to keep an actual girlfriend ... a real woman?
To make a long story short, Jack allowed Jesus to run his life ... finally. He gave up Bourbon Street, the strippers, even cybering online and, of course, the porn. Which is why it strikes him every time a woman of a certain type considers him to be sexually wrong. He has approached me about the problem, the barn house female situation, and one oldest sister in particular who ran away from taking care of that nest of crime only to cry 'rape' in a way every time she encounters him. Jack is pushing 50, has been a professional athlete, is an expert marksman (256 on the gun range), has been a security guard, but has never had a serious relationship with a woman. But, the one thing I remind him of is the fact that he is not responsible for the barn yard household. They drew their lots, had their fight, and if that older sister of that family who ran away has a problem then SHE SHOULD BE REPORTED!!! There are those in that house who work at the grocery, but EAT THE AUNT OUT OF HOUSE AND HOME, REFUSE TO TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE, AND LAY AROUND ALL DAY STILL DRINKING ALL DAY!!! IF IT WEREN'T FOR JACK GOING TO GET GROCERIES THEN THE AUNT WOULD BE SICK AND STARVE!!! BIG SISTER REFUSES TO SEE THAT FACT, MAKING COMMENTARIES ONLINE ABOUT CLOSING MCDONALD'S DOWN, ATTACKING BIG OIL AND EVEN THE CATHOLIC CHURCH DAILY!!! SHE HAS A BIG PROBLEM, AND TOO MUCH ON HER PLATE!!!
I've advised him to place it all in the care of
St. Jude. Pray with me!
Novena To
St. Jude
Most holy Apostle, St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the Church honors and invokes you universally, as the patron of difficult cases, of things almost despaired of, Pray for me, I am so helpless and alone.
Intercede with God for me that He bring visible and speedy help where help is almost despaired of. Come to my assistance in this great need that I may receive the consolation and help of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations, and sufferings, particularly -
(make your request here)
- and that I may praise God with you and all the saints forever. I promise, O Blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor granted me by God and to always honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to gratefully encourage devotion to you.
Amen. Anon.
Most holy Apostle, St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the Church honors and invokes you universally, as the patron of difficult cases, of things almost despaired of, Pray for me, I am so helpless and alone.
Intercede with God for me that He bring visible and speedy help where help is almost despaired of. Come to my assistance in this great need that I may receive the consolation and help of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations, and sufferings, particularly -
(make your request here)
- and that I may praise God with you and all the saints forever. I promise, O Blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor granted me by God and to always honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to gratefully encourage devotion to you.
Amen. Anon.
Thursday, February 26, 2015
A prayer of submission ... wives obey husbands .... be mothers!! :)
A prayer of submission would be in order:
“Father, help me to be content in the role you created me for and give me a submissive spirit, not only toward my mate, but also toward each member in the body of Christ. Let me serve and not expect to be served. Create within me a lamb-like spirit even as Christ our Lord had. Amen.”
End the Hostility between men and women, Love each other.
“Father, help me to be content in the role you created me for and give me a submissive spirit, not only toward my mate, but also toward each member in the body of Christ. Let me serve and not expect to be served. Create within me a lamb-like spirit even as Christ our Lord had. Amen.”
End the Hostility between men and women, Love each other.
Proverbs 15:1 says
“A soft answer
turneth away
wrath: but grievous
words stir up anger.”
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
A woman's place/duties ..... according to the bible ....... :)
1 Corinthians 7:1-40
Now concerning the matters about which you wrote:
The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband.
Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. ...
HAVING BEEN A SEMINARIAN MYSELF I KNOW WELL THAT THIS (AND MANY OTHER BIBLICAL PASSAGES) WERE WRITTEN FOR SPECIFIC POPULATIONS. THAT'S WHY THERE ARE 4 GOSPELS (AND OTHER WE AREN'T ALLOWED TO READ).
HOWEVER, JUST LIKE I EDITED THE WRITING ABOVE, YOU HAVE TO BE CAREFUL TO READ THE WHOLE THING FOR WHOM IT WAS WRITTEN, AND WHY! PEOPLE SEE WHAT THEY WANT TO SEE, AND READ WHAT THEY WANT TO READ!
REMEMBER, SOMETIMES A PLANT IS JUST A PLANT .... NOT THE WEED THAT YOU SMOKED!!! LET S/HE WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE!! AMEN. ANON.
Now concerning the matters about which you wrote:
“It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” [REALLY?]
But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.
For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does.
Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. ...
HAVING BEEN A SEMINARIAN MYSELF I KNOW WELL THAT THIS (AND MANY OTHER BIBLICAL PASSAGES) WERE WRITTEN FOR SPECIFIC POPULATIONS. THAT'S WHY THERE ARE 4 GOSPELS (AND OTHER WE AREN'T ALLOWED TO READ).
HOWEVER, JUST LIKE I EDITED THE WRITING ABOVE, YOU HAVE TO BE CAREFUL TO READ THE WHOLE THING FOR WHOM IT WAS WRITTEN, AND WHY! PEOPLE SEE WHAT THEY WANT TO SEE, AND READ WHAT THEY WANT TO READ!
REMEMBER, SOMETIMES A PLANT IS JUST A PLANT .... NOT THE WEED THAT YOU SMOKED!!! LET S/HE WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE!! AMEN. ANON.
Friday, February 20, 2015
Mark of Gideon, Sgt. Pepper tail end baby boom, & America ... the end???!!!
So, you’re
afraid of men … particularly heterosexual men.
Remember that a lot of time has
gone by since the 1950’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s. A good number of things that were news back
then are now old things. A number of us have had to live with, and pay for, those Alice-doesn't-live-here-attitudes-all of our lives. For instance, remember when Ms. Emma Peel
from the British Avengers and St. Pepper Police woman were new and shocking!!!
But, there was another episode of Star Trek the original series that deserves notice. It was the episode about overpopulation where, during the episode, we saw the poor people huddled together trying to get to work (or where ever) like China was considered to be for a long time. This was a definite statement on overpopulation, & pro-abortion is somewhere in there (although a better example of that is in the second season of the Next Generation series TNG). The list of violations against women’s rights and the rebut from women’s rights goes on and on and on in science fiction. All of these themes were launched all throughout the 20th century, but the tail end of the baby boom has now risen to the rank of being the keepers of the key, the tellers of the story and I want to get the story straight before they put their all too whiney 'Jody from the television show Soap' on this matter. In fact, it was primarily Robin Williams and Billy Crystal characterizations that led the way to the “Crying Game” and a line of guilt ridden young men wrapping around the block at John's Hopkins to get sex change operations. But, what they won’t tell you is the emotional toll it takes on a male to play such loveable roles. Just as Marilyn Monroe is an UNREAL ideal for a man to expect for a woman, so are those ‘whiney’ characters that modern women impose on men for the sake of ‘cuteness’. I’m NOT SORRY FOR SAYING THIS! I CAN’T DO IT ANYMORE … IT’S JUST AS SEXIST, EMOTIONALLY FOR WOMEN TO EXPECT MEN TO BE EMOTIONAL ON THE FEMALE LEVEL!!!! I’M JUST NOT F**KING CUTE (AND I WON'T PRETEND TO BE)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M JUST NOT ROBIN WILLIAMS, GOD REST HIS SOUL!!!
Here I am spending my life
trying NOT TO BE CRIMINAL, but that’s not enough!!! Depending upon your temperament and just how
your were raised and just what you watched on television, there are those
eyeballing us the wrong way. I have
associations that are scrutinized a different way than I am, because they ARE
ACTUALLY THE PEDOPHILE SEX CRIMINALS!!! But, if myyyyy
vocal tone has that proverbial BASS IN IT reflecting heterosexual balls, then
the MRS. DOUBTFIRE / RENT/ PRODUCERS ALARM gets sounded. I had no idea!
Looking at modern day television its
not hard to see, however, that those who used to play whores on Starsky and
Hutch and Beretta are NOW THE POLICE CHIEFS: Janice Lester’s revenge at
last. I was happy & ecstatic with
Captain Katherine Janeway and Lt. Anita Van Buren (Law and
Order). But, when the alarms and
whistles go off on me when in the very presence of male criminals and lesbians
living their lives the way they want to, I’m gonna f**king say something. I know when I’ve been internalized to a
feminine and very mentally/emotionally ill community as their ‘it’ boy, just
like male sexists do to females. Oh, wow you say! Finally a male know how a
woman feels. BUT, WHICH MALES! IT’S
NEVER THE ACTUAL GANGSTA’S, NEVER THE JOHN WAYES’ OR WILLIAM SHATNERS OR KIRK
DOUGLAS’ that get yelled at! YOU DIDN’T DARE SAY ANYTHING
TO THE BOGARTS OR THE CAGNEYS OR THE SINATRAS IN ANY ROLE!!! WHY ME???
I’M
flattered in a way that I’ve somehow gained the trust of those who think I’m
cute or different from those they usually have to play gangsta moll to. But,
enough is enough!!! We are a generation
of people caught in the wake of Shaggy and Scooby and all things Robin Hood
cute, except for the gangsta’s of course! They can do what they want to. But, higher expectations of me keeps falling
into p-e-d-o-p-h-i-l-e criminally insane hands.
I am not a political puppet!!!!
Please tend to your own houses, the houses YOU abandoned when YOU
decided NOT TO BE AUTHORITIES IN YOUR OWN HOUSEHOLDS!! THE HOMES YOU RAN AWAY
FROM!!! I’M NOT TRYING TO PARENT YOUR CHILDREN, BUT THE REAL PEDOPHILES ARE OUT
HERE ON THE INTERNET, AND IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOODS!!! TEND TO THEM!!! AMEN. ANON.
Monday, February 9, 2015
Blessing our Relationship ... Clinging to the Holy Spirit!!!
Serving notice as of this moment: My wife and I have something so say !!!
Henceforth we sever any ties with the Satanic covens of pedophiles, yes pedophiles, who have seen fit in their sickness to adopt us as their pet projects to change our sexuality, adulthood, or anything else that threatens our family status. We hereby declare our love to ourselves as adults and ourselves free from the foolishness of this age.
We profess our heterosexual marriage and our love making is OUR OWN BUSINESS!!! We have been nonjudgemental to others and their sexuality and we would prefer it if others just left us alone as to what we do in our bed. Thank you. Nuff said. Amen. Anon.
Henceforth we sever any ties with the Satanic covens of pedophiles, yes pedophiles, who have seen fit in their sickness to adopt us as their pet projects to change our sexuality, adulthood, or anything else that threatens our family status. We hereby declare our love to ourselves as adults and ourselves free from the foolishness of this age.
We profess our heterosexual marriage and our love making is OUR OWN BUSINESS!!! We have been nonjudgemental to others and their sexuality and we would prefer it if others just left us alone as to what we do in our bed. Thank you. Nuff said. Amen. Anon.
Friday, February 6, 2015
WARNING ABOUT NEW ORLEANS: Final Post on Driven-Part 4
Warning: New Orleans is not the single city you may think it is! It was not founded by one group of settlers at a particular point in time. Spanish, French, German, British and other Caucasians make their claim about founding the 'colony', but the nonwhite population of original Native Americans (not at all from India), Africans (called 'Blacks' and called 'West Indians', also), Asians from various cultures (don't you dare confuse them with each other, i.e., Japanese are not Chinese, etc.), and the countless other 'races' of people, yes even real Indians from India. But, the world, according to American racism, was once White, Black, and Red, and sometimes Yellow/Brown. The skin color descriptions of people AS RACES are indeed INSULTING! Then, there are the Creoles like my family, those people descended from multiple 'racial' origins. Thus, skin color orientations mean nothing to me at all as I've explained. Yet, racists have acted as though skin color is the be all end all means of describing what they call different species of people, which is what they are all about. For me, you have to put that in a bottle, show me the genetic proof that connects skin color with whatever they are talking about (intelligence, sexuality, criminal tendencies, etc.)
But, there are two problems with this: (1) Dermatology is the only science of skin color so you have to draw upon Melanin and what it supposedly does, and (2) Once you put something in that bottle you have to make some money SOLVING THE RACE PROBLEM! In other words, you've just made dermatologists ALOT OF MONEY!!! OPEN YOUR OWN WING OF A HOSPITAL WHERE YOU CHANGE PEOPLE'S RACES (SKIN COLORS AND EYE SLANTS, ETC.) TO CHANGE THEIR BEHAVIORS. Change the genetic destiny of families based upon changing these superficial features. I make the challenge to racists to carry out what I just said. Because in the world of empirical science IF YOU CAN PUT IT INTO A BOTTLE THEN YOU CAN CURE IT!!! TELL ME WHAT THE CORRELATION BETWEEN SKIN COLOR AND INTELLIGENCE IS AND CURE IT IN A REAL HOSPITAL!
IN OTHER WORDS YOU HAVE TO SHOW ME THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST CHASING SHADOWS! SHOW ME THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST QUIXOTICALLY CHASING BLACK DRAGONS! SHOW ME THAT IT'S NOT JUST THE BLACK BOOGIE MAN OF YOUR SOCIAL MYTHOLOGY THAT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ... BECAUSE QUITE FRANKLY I'M SICK OF BEING THE PLACE HOLDER IN THIS WICKED ALGEBRA!!! IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE DARK, DO NOT USE ME!!! DO NOT COME TO NEW ORLEANS LOOKING FOR THE SOURCE OF CRIME VIA HERESAY!! TOO MANY PEOPLE ARE VICTIMS OF CRIME TO COME HUNTING 'BLACK NIGGERS' HERE IN THEIR NATURAL HABITAT!!! THERE ARE CRIMINALS IN EVERY NEIGHBORHOOD, INCLUDING MINE. BUT, IF YOU COME TO NEW ORLEANS EYEBALLING THE DARKEST SKIN COLORED PEOPLE AS THE CRIMINAL ELEMENT, YOU ARE GOING TO BE VICTIMS!! YOU ARE GOING TO BE VICTIMIZED BY THE MANY OTHER COLORED (INCLUDING WHITE) CRIMINALS. EITHER THAT OR YOU ARE GOING TO COME ACROSS ME, AND I WILL TURN STATES EVIDENCE ON BOTH THEM AND YOU!!! STOP HARASSING ME!!! PLEASE!!! STOP SETTING ME UP!!! THE VEHICLE I'M DRIVING IS MINE, I'M PAYING FOR IT. MY FAMILY HOME IS MINE AS WELL. HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!
AMEN!!! ANON!!!
But, there are two problems with this: (1) Dermatology is the only science of skin color so you have to draw upon Melanin and what it supposedly does, and (2) Once you put something in that bottle you have to make some money SOLVING THE RACE PROBLEM! In other words, you've just made dermatologists ALOT OF MONEY!!! OPEN YOUR OWN WING OF A HOSPITAL WHERE YOU CHANGE PEOPLE'S RACES (SKIN COLORS AND EYE SLANTS, ETC.) TO CHANGE THEIR BEHAVIORS. Change the genetic destiny of families based upon changing these superficial features. I make the challenge to racists to carry out what I just said. Because in the world of empirical science IF YOU CAN PUT IT INTO A BOTTLE THEN YOU CAN CURE IT!!! TELL ME WHAT THE CORRELATION BETWEEN SKIN COLOR AND INTELLIGENCE IS AND CURE IT IN A REAL HOSPITAL!
IN OTHER WORDS YOU HAVE TO SHOW ME THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST CHASING SHADOWS! SHOW ME THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST QUIXOTICALLY CHASING BLACK DRAGONS! SHOW ME THAT IT'S NOT JUST THE BLACK BOOGIE MAN OF YOUR SOCIAL MYTHOLOGY THAT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ... BECAUSE QUITE FRANKLY I'M SICK OF BEING THE PLACE HOLDER IN THIS WICKED ALGEBRA!!! IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE DARK, DO NOT USE ME!!! DO NOT COME TO NEW ORLEANS LOOKING FOR THE SOURCE OF CRIME VIA HERESAY!! TOO MANY PEOPLE ARE VICTIMS OF CRIME TO COME HUNTING 'BLACK NIGGERS' HERE IN THEIR NATURAL HABITAT!!! THERE ARE CRIMINALS IN EVERY NEIGHBORHOOD, INCLUDING MINE. BUT, IF YOU COME TO NEW ORLEANS EYEBALLING THE DARKEST SKIN COLORED PEOPLE AS THE CRIMINAL ELEMENT, YOU ARE GOING TO BE VICTIMS!! YOU ARE GOING TO BE VICTIMIZED BY THE MANY OTHER COLORED (INCLUDING WHITE) CRIMINALS. EITHER THAT OR YOU ARE GOING TO COME ACROSS ME, AND I WILL TURN STATES EVIDENCE ON BOTH THEM AND YOU!!! STOP HARASSING ME!!! PLEASE!!! STOP SETTING ME UP!!! THE VEHICLE I'M DRIVING IS MINE, I'M PAYING FOR IT. MY FAMILY HOME IS MINE AS WELL. HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!
AMEN!!! ANON!!!
Thursday, February 5, 2015
A Prayer for Amazon Kindle & Create Space ...... Success!!! Good luck with books and record sales!!!
Dearest Holy Spirit I am stupid, heartless, & cowardly without you.
I give thanks for my one sale on Amazon Kindle notebook.....
the ONE book I bought just to get the ball rolling a month ago ...
is enough to make me thank Jesus, I'm successful .... just look.
2
1 *(one)
January 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 February 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22
Dearest Holy Spirit I am stupid, heartless, & cowardly without you.
My Create Space sales have been much better in point of fact,
I made 5 sales in the month of January that I was able to detect
although I wonder if it was true the 5 copies I bought in paperback.
******************************************************
Dashboad January >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>5 copies<<<<<<<<<<<<<
******************************************************
Dearest Holy Spirit I am stupid, heartless, & cowardly without you.
My success with uploading my tunes onto Create Space ... whew!!
They said to zip the file using .MP3 .aiff -or- .aiff formats.
I did as they asked 7 times thus far, one successfully, who knew!!??
(my songs are on MySpace under Citizendave321 >> Lover Dave
is the album.)
They say that prayer has power, well God BLESS all forms and affiliates with Amazon for trying. I'm letting you all know about my success. Pray along with me, spread this prayer across the internet! Please, I'm begging you to.
I give thanks for my one sale on Amazon Kindle notebook.....
the ONE book I bought just to get the ball rolling a month ago ...
is enough to make me thank Jesus, I'm successful .... just look.
2
1 *(one)
January 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 February 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22
Dearest Holy Spirit I am stupid, heartless, & cowardly without you.
My Create Space sales have been much better in point of fact,
I made 5 sales in the month of January that I was able to detect
although I wonder if it was true the 5 copies I bought in paperback.
******************************************************
Dashboad January >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>5 copies<<<<<<<<<<<<<
******************************************************
Dearest Holy Spirit I am stupid, heartless, & cowardly without you.
My success with uploading my tunes onto Create Space ... whew!!
They said to zip the file using .MP3 .aiff -or- .aiff formats.
I did as they asked 7 times thus far, one successfully, who knew!!??
(my songs are on MySpace under Citizendave321 >> Lover Dave
is the album.)
They say that prayer has power, well God BLESS all forms and affiliates with Amazon for trying. I'm letting you all know about my success. Pray along with me, spread this prayer across the internet! Please, I'm begging you to.
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
And now for something COMPLETELY different! I mean it RAINBOW LOVE!!!
It strikes me that the power of the written (or spoken) word has a great deal of power!! Because of my strong use of words you might think that I'm the biggest bigot. Just because I'm NOT GAY doesn't mean that I have hate for them ... or you. Or because I sound like a 'black militant' that I hate European descendants. Actually, these misconceptions are what I am trying to fight. The only thing is that in order to say certain specific things I have to use words that one could take out of context. So, I sound 'luke warm', a gangsta that wants to have a soft side, or a gay man that fronts with the macho. I am neither one!!! I represent what guys used to be before 'gangsta' and 'gay' extremes both exploded as the ONLY choices for us male human beings of browner skin color. That marginalizing is completely unfair!!! We are a family of humans no matter what the skin color from one end of the skin color spectrum to the other. How sad that when some of us speak our minds others fail to realize that preColumbian preHistoric angle I'm coming from is legally human, an assertion of my history!!!! You are seeing and hearing men like my grandfather, my father, my older cousins, and others that you may not know or like, but who had profound influences on me. Second, my family is so multiracial that if you came to a family reunion you would see every color and hints of every culture on the rainbow. There, I'm Creole-Black (African)-white(European)-Asian-Native American, and probably more. So, there ... surprise!!!
With that being said, I know that many if not most of you are wondering when the FORGIVENESS is going to start. Well, I have been forgiving this whole time. One of my greatest pet peeves is a direct misunderstanding of Jesus' image. Remember that HIS dying words were, "Father Forgive them for they know not what they do." and "Into your hands I commend your spirit." Then he died. However, I defy you to find a single passage from the gospels where Jesus was just, and I quote, "as quiet as a lamb." What then was the reason for HIS murder? Jesus quite simply was the MODEL for TALKING TOO MUCH in the eyes of his murderers. Yet, he still FORGAVE them. Doesn't anyone realize by now that LOVE HURTS, like making love. (ahem, did I say that?) And, sometimes delivering WITH LOVE hurts. Mind you, the hurt is not intentional, but incidental ... he smites but he binds up ... things of that sort.
So, that being said I know that I've said things that some people may be confused by, even hurt by .... THERE IS REALLY NO SUCH THING AS A NIGGER, REALLY OK!!! Honest!!! Race is just a made up political game and its most recent incarnation has widely used skin color. But, other senseless crap has been used. I don't want to spend time rehashing what I've already said. But, I want you to know that I forgive you ... for firing me, for beating me up, for stealing from me, for poisoning me, for stranding me alone, for cursing me out, for despising me, for shunning me, for turning me out, for turning me away. The function of the Holy Trinity is the Father (Creator), the Son (Incarnation), and the Holy Spirit (Forgiveness). I prefer to remember you as friends, we had a good time. But, remember what I've said in all of these blogs. God Bless you all. Amen. Anon.
With that being said, I know that many if not most of you are wondering when the FORGIVENESS is going to start. Well, I have been forgiving this whole time. One of my greatest pet peeves is a direct misunderstanding of Jesus' image. Remember that HIS dying words were, "Father Forgive them for they know not what they do." and "Into your hands I commend your spirit." Then he died. However, I defy you to find a single passage from the gospels where Jesus was just, and I quote, "as quiet as a lamb." What then was the reason for HIS murder? Jesus quite simply was the MODEL for TALKING TOO MUCH in the eyes of his murderers. Yet, he still FORGAVE them. Doesn't anyone realize by now that LOVE HURTS, like making love. (ahem, did I say that?) And, sometimes delivering WITH LOVE hurts. Mind you, the hurt is not intentional, but incidental ... he smites but he binds up ... things of that sort.
So, that being said I know that I've said things that some people may be confused by, even hurt by .... THERE IS REALLY NO SUCH THING AS A NIGGER, REALLY OK!!! Honest!!! Race is just a made up political game and its most recent incarnation has widely used skin color. But, other senseless crap has been used. I don't want to spend time rehashing what I've already said. But, I want you to know that I forgive you ... for firing me, for beating me up, for stealing from me, for poisoning me, for stranding me alone, for cursing me out, for despising me, for shunning me, for turning me out, for turning me away. The function of the Holy Trinity is the Father (Creator), the Son (Incarnation), and the Holy Spirit (Forgiveness). I prefer to remember you as friends, we had a good time. But, remember what I've said in all of these blogs. God Bless you all. Amen. Anon.
The truth ... finally ...... :) THE CONSPIRACY CONTINUES!!!
Finally, the truth comes out! See, I was born during the 1960's and came of age during the 'swingtown' 1970's, i.e., the height of the sexual revolution ... free sex every where. As I've explained, I had to endure those cheezy attacks on maleness that formed the basis for shows like Good Times, Alice (spin off from Alice doesn't live here anymore), One Day at a Time (strike a Ms. Romano pose with that female mullet hair), and my favorite of all time Gilligan (reruns). Each in some form or another weekly chopped away at maleness, and Good Times even portrayed the man of the house, James Evans (or did he have another name in previous incarnations of the show) was portrayed as a hothead. At the same time Roger Thomas and the rest of his crew were getting their collective asses whipped by big mama Mabel King every week on 'What's Happening' usually being ratted out by lil sister Dee. Looking back I can't believe how much we were brainwashed by our daily doses of pedophile run anti straightness and used to play the role of GUILTBOYS for another generation's transgressions.
HAVE I LEFT OUT BATTLE OF THE NETWORK STARS?? SPECIFICALLY BATTLE OF THE SEXES, WEEKLY!!! All these shows set the stage for a weekly brawl in elementary school classroom across 1970's America where in the brillian educators had the nerve to sexually (and racially) segregate the classes KEEPING THE BOYS AWAY FROM THE GIRLS! The point I'm getting to is that those of us who couldn't hold a candle to our male 'asshole' forebears who ran Operation Petticoat have been getting our asses kicked long enough. The true insult is that as time dragged on the true gangstas have become male heroes and role models: Ice Tea, Ice Cube, RUNDMC, LL Cool J, Snoop Dog/Lion, Cash Money, Lil Wayne, etc, you know the ones that were supposed to kill themselves off like Biggie and Tupac (who were murdered by racist groups to start the east coast west coast war that didn't happen). While, in their place the legacy of the Danziger Bridge, Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, etc. tells the story of a nation who not only let their murders happen, but ... and follow this ... it FEELS LIKE their murders were being used to balance out what happened at Columbine, Aurora, Virginia Tech, New Town, etc. So, I guess misery does like company. When crimes involved no black males at all, those of us WHO WERE NOT ARMED WERE USED SYMBOLICALLY. JUST ANY OLD UGLY BLACK NIGGA WILL DO!
But, as you see, that leaves the true criminals not only in control, but PLANNING THEIR NEXT GROUP OF COLUMBINES and THEIR NEXT DISTRACTIONS (OJ, RODNEY KING, ETC.) THE CONSPIRACY AGAINST THOSE OF US WHO SHOW PROMISE CONTINUES!!! WHY ARE THOSE OF US MURDERED THE ONES EITHER PLANNING TO GO ON TO GRAD/TECH SCHOOL AND WHO JUST HAPPEN TO BE UNARMED???? CLEARLY, THE RACIST FANTASY FIXATION ON SKIN COLORED PUPPETS TO THE ENEMY CONCEPT HAVE US FRAMED BY THAT FACTOR! THIS IS THE END OF THE USA. YOU ARE RUNNING OUT OF NIGGAS ... AND OTHER PEOPLE ARE 500 YEARS HIP TO THIS CRAP!!! WHAT'S NEXT: WAR WITH NORTH KOREA, CHINA, VIETNAM AGAIN? WE'VE ALREADY SEEN RACISTS IN THE MIDDLE EAST DUPLICATED THE MY LAI SLAUGHTER IN VIETNAM!!! IT'S ALL GONNA COME BACK ON ALL THOSE WHO SINGLE OUT THOSE OF US MADE INTO TARGETS BY COMPLEXION AND GENDER. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT ... IS UP TO YOU! AMEN. ANON.
HAVE I LEFT OUT BATTLE OF THE NETWORK STARS?? SPECIFICALLY BATTLE OF THE SEXES, WEEKLY!!! All these shows set the stage for a weekly brawl in elementary school classroom across 1970's America where in the brillian educators had the nerve to sexually (and racially) segregate the classes KEEPING THE BOYS AWAY FROM THE GIRLS! The point I'm getting to is that those of us who couldn't hold a candle to our male 'asshole' forebears who ran Operation Petticoat have been getting our asses kicked long enough. The true insult is that as time dragged on the true gangstas have become male heroes and role models: Ice Tea, Ice Cube, RUNDMC, LL Cool J, Snoop Dog/Lion, Cash Money, Lil Wayne, etc, you know the ones that were supposed to kill themselves off like Biggie and Tupac (who were murdered by racist groups to start the east coast west coast war that didn't happen). While, in their place the legacy of the Danziger Bridge, Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin, etc. tells the story of a nation who not only let their murders happen, but ... and follow this ... it FEELS LIKE their murders were being used to balance out what happened at Columbine, Aurora, Virginia Tech, New Town, etc. So, I guess misery does like company. When crimes involved no black males at all, those of us WHO WERE NOT ARMED WERE USED SYMBOLICALLY. JUST ANY OLD UGLY BLACK NIGGA WILL DO!
But, as you see, that leaves the true criminals not only in control, but PLANNING THEIR NEXT GROUP OF COLUMBINES and THEIR NEXT DISTRACTIONS (OJ, RODNEY KING, ETC.) THE CONSPIRACY AGAINST THOSE OF US WHO SHOW PROMISE CONTINUES!!! WHY ARE THOSE OF US MURDERED THE ONES EITHER PLANNING TO GO ON TO GRAD/TECH SCHOOL AND WHO JUST HAPPEN TO BE UNARMED???? CLEARLY, THE RACIST FANTASY FIXATION ON SKIN COLORED PUPPETS TO THE ENEMY CONCEPT HAVE US FRAMED BY THAT FACTOR! THIS IS THE END OF THE USA. YOU ARE RUNNING OUT OF NIGGAS ... AND OTHER PEOPLE ARE 500 YEARS HIP TO THIS CRAP!!! WHAT'S NEXT: WAR WITH NORTH KOREA, CHINA, VIETNAM AGAIN? WE'VE ALREADY SEEN RACISTS IN THE MIDDLE EAST DUPLICATED THE MY LAI SLAUGHTER IN VIETNAM!!! IT'S ALL GONNA COME BACK ON ALL THOSE WHO SINGLE OUT THOSE OF US MADE INTO TARGETS BY COMPLEXION AND GENDER. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT ... IS UP TO YOU! AMEN. ANON.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Uh Uh .... the Zombie (me) figured it out!! Little boys, do we count ....... ??
Getting right to the point, back during the middle seventies (1970's ) a little girl from my elementary school took off her panties on our 'school bus', for whatever reason ... she did it. Word got out about this incident, and immediately she burst into tears and was surrounded by her 'protectors', those girls who surrounded her. I was too young to think like I'm thinking now, for amid the laughter and taunting from the most ignorant people there I failed to see something. Word would get out about the event, but the way racist people think, (even our own people) it was the little "nigga's" who would get the blame. Any boy there on that bus was suspect of harassing that girl, I didn't know that at the time or how it would directly affect my life (is that why I ended up going to the seminary?).
It was during that same time that so called 'white flight' was taking place, and oh well I might as well say it I was involved in a few altercations during that time in my life, fights, that I'm not proud of. But, as 'whites' became more afraid of 'blacks', (you know those riots and all we all took part in), they fled into the suburbs to get away from us, by skin color that is. Almighty skin color, does anyone get what I'm saying in my previous posts about the Manson family murders? Well, anyway, it was the heart of the seventies, sex was rampant, AIDS did not exist and Gonorrhea and Syphilis were the only things to worry about, besides the bigotry that kept people apart.
Well, my question today is: "Was it fair to let any agency focus on the little boys associated with the incident?" We don't have will and grace during that time period, and as I've explained episodes of Barney Miller and (of course) Three's Company (by implication) were the avenues of getting the public used to the topic. Eventually, more and more 'Ms. Romano hitting that pose' shows and staging more and more lesson learning speeches against Jack Trippers & Mels-Bookmans-(and of course)-Schneiders so that the stage was set for Will and Grace. In the mean time the Producers, Rent, and Torch Song Triligy set the stage for the Crying Game and such and the rest is history. "We are gay and here to stay" proudly marched in the Irish Day parades, and (I don't believe I'm gonna say this, quote me) THAT IS FINE!!! GOD BLESS THEM!!!
BUT, (with capital B-U-T), getting back to that bus, an element of certain people regrouped as racists and pedophiles against US BOYS ON THAT BUS (by skin color of course)!!! More precisely, no one has been looking at the fact that after a certain point actual pedophiles against male development took control regrouping against us, vulnerable boys taking the blame for generations of abuse against females. THIS GUILT AND SHAME POLITICS IS WHAT LEAD TO THE LARGEST INCREASE IN THE TRANSEXUAL POPULATION IN HISTORY. IT LITERALLY KEPT JOHNS HOPKINS IN BUSINESS WITH LINES OF GUILTY BOYS WRAPPED AROUND THE BLOCK.
I'm saying all this because it's the point I've been making all along about racism. It regrouped, it became nicer, but its goals are still the same. It literally paints a group of predominanty dark skinned males as the problem and turns its back on the 90% of the real criminals walking around. Oh, but you feel comfortable around the ex convicts walking around with tampons shoved up their asses and using their buttholes as vaginas to sell themselves as females with breasts to boot. It's the GUILT AND SHAME factor at being CAUGHT BEING MALE IN PUBLIC and INCRIMINATING any nonwhite male that is the problem. I've been CAUGHT now many times being male in public and I know about those WEBSITES AND INTERNET CONNECTIONS TRACKING STRAIGHT MALES!!! YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT THEY EXIST IF YOU DON'T!!!
Finally, let's get back to that girl who took her drawers off on that bus. What I didn't notice until I hypnotized myself later was the GIRLS THAT ATTACKED HER, TOO!!! They practically raped her worst than any male could with their words. But, NO ONE remembers that!!!!! Recently, a group of girls beat the shit out of another girl as an initiation tactic and it was caught on camera. There are girls screwing the piss out of each other all over the internet. There are 12 inch penis white boys screwing everyone including other (underaged) males all over the internet. But, what I keep experiencing are those people who have a vested interest in aiming at the OJ/Tiger Woods/Creature from the Black Lagoon factor that is presently trying to get to Bill Cosby! As I've said they make no attempt at Claus Von Bulo looking men (who's that?) and I am continuously profiled by employers as a juvenille myself, specifically by those who are juvenille deliquents pitted against me today. I'm sick of it, and something WILL BE DONE. I DIDN'T TAKE THE LITTLE GIRL'S DRAWERS OFF ON THAT BUS, AND I SHOULD NOT BE PENALIZED JUST FOR BEING THERE OR FOR BEING STRAIGHT!!! I AM NOT CHANGING, I LIKE WOMEN/FEMALES!!! AMEN! ANON!
It was during that same time that so called 'white flight' was taking place, and oh well I might as well say it I was involved in a few altercations during that time in my life, fights, that I'm not proud of. But, as 'whites' became more afraid of 'blacks', (you know those riots and all we all took part in), they fled into the suburbs to get away from us, by skin color that is. Almighty skin color, does anyone get what I'm saying in my previous posts about the Manson family murders? Well, anyway, it was the heart of the seventies, sex was rampant, AIDS did not exist and Gonorrhea and Syphilis were the only things to worry about, besides the bigotry that kept people apart.
Well, my question today is: "Was it fair to let any agency focus on the little boys associated with the incident?" We don't have will and grace during that time period, and as I've explained episodes of Barney Miller and (of course) Three's Company (by implication) were the avenues of getting the public used to the topic. Eventually, more and more 'Ms. Romano hitting that pose' shows and staging more and more lesson learning speeches against Jack Trippers & Mels-Bookmans-(and of course)-Schneiders so that the stage was set for Will and Grace. In the mean time the Producers, Rent, and Torch Song Triligy set the stage for the Crying Game and such and the rest is history. "We are gay and here to stay" proudly marched in the Irish Day parades, and (I don't believe I'm gonna say this, quote me) THAT IS FINE!!! GOD BLESS THEM!!!
BUT, (with capital B-U-T), getting back to that bus, an element of certain people regrouped as racists and pedophiles against US BOYS ON THAT BUS (by skin color of course)!!! More precisely, no one has been looking at the fact that after a certain point actual pedophiles against male development took control regrouping against us, vulnerable boys taking the blame for generations of abuse against females. THIS GUILT AND SHAME POLITICS IS WHAT LEAD TO THE LARGEST INCREASE IN THE TRANSEXUAL POPULATION IN HISTORY. IT LITERALLY KEPT JOHNS HOPKINS IN BUSINESS WITH LINES OF GUILTY BOYS WRAPPED AROUND THE BLOCK.
I'm saying all this because it's the point I've been making all along about racism. It regrouped, it became nicer, but its goals are still the same. It literally paints a group of predominanty dark skinned males as the problem and turns its back on the 90% of the real criminals walking around. Oh, but you feel comfortable around the ex convicts walking around with tampons shoved up their asses and using their buttholes as vaginas to sell themselves as females with breasts to boot. It's the GUILT AND SHAME factor at being CAUGHT BEING MALE IN PUBLIC and INCRIMINATING any nonwhite male that is the problem. I've been CAUGHT now many times being male in public and I know about those WEBSITES AND INTERNET CONNECTIONS TRACKING STRAIGHT MALES!!! YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT THEY EXIST IF YOU DON'T!!!
Finally, let's get back to that girl who took her drawers off on that bus. What I didn't notice until I hypnotized myself later was the GIRLS THAT ATTACKED HER, TOO!!! They practically raped her worst than any male could with their words. But, NO ONE remembers that!!!!! Recently, a group of girls beat the shit out of another girl as an initiation tactic and it was caught on camera. There are girls screwing the piss out of each other all over the internet. There are 12 inch penis white boys screwing everyone including other (underaged) males all over the internet. But, what I keep experiencing are those people who have a vested interest in aiming at the OJ/Tiger Woods/Creature from the Black Lagoon factor that is presently trying to get to Bill Cosby! As I've said they make no attempt at Claus Von Bulo looking men (who's that?) and I am continuously profiled by employers as a juvenille myself, specifically by those who are juvenille deliquents pitted against me today. I'm sick of it, and something WILL BE DONE. I DIDN'T TAKE THE LITTLE GIRL'S DRAWERS OFF ON THAT BUS, AND I SHOULD NOT BE PENALIZED JUST FOR BEING THERE OR FOR BEING STRAIGHT!!! I AM NOT CHANGING, I LIKE WOMEN/FEMALES!!! AMEN! ANON!
Monday, February 2, 2015
Recipe for disaster ..... Driven Part 3!!! I'm not a criminal!
What does it means to be escorted out of the building?", a young man once asked me. It was that second time that I showed up at Channel 12 certain that I was going to graduate from UNO in electrical engineering. At the time my blood pressure was about 170/95, I was overweight, I had not yet begun to monitor my health which is why I caught pnuemonia, various skin ailments, and everything else reflecting self neglect. To make a long story short I've come to the realization that there are forces that do not want me to be the visible sign of success so badly that they are willing to drive all 'black males' into criminal icons/stereotypes. I've given this speech before, but I've never gotten to the point: that those who are doing the driving are themselves criminals. What's more, to answer the question, the reason why I was escorted out of the building is because I didn't fit the criminal profile, i.e. I will NEVER be criminal competition. The only reason for driving me away from my major is to drive me into crime, that is a predictable criminal. Remember 'Dial M for Murder', well some greedy bastards are so loathesome that they want me to be that sniveling "Swann" character. But, they are indeed jumping the gun if they figure that leaning on me financially is going to force me into a lifenazi-quasi-Jim Crow attempt at using a man's skin color to frame of crime. Simply put, I'm not a criminal and this generation's neo ME as a circa 1970's Beretta/Starsky and Hutch 'Huggy Bear' type is for nothing. I guess it's the only script you know in a failed attempt to send Mr. Tibbs back to where ever he came from. But, I get the message. But, I leave you with this stern warning: Charles Manson (America's new father figure) is getting married while your attempts to drive 'black males' into that transparent trap is still going on. Remember, you heard this from me first ... or, others who bothered to convey this message and who were ignored. You see, I know what's happening. There are runaway serial killers who you cannot find, desks filled with caseloads where there is no evidence. Ever notice that in those police districts that a BLACK MALE VICTIMIZATION BY POLICE WILL SUFFICE. That crappy PR move, satisfies the racist press and racist political agents. But, crime continues to grow, get out of hand, and is painted BLACK by the racist media/political system. Well, I guess you need a scapegoat, but NOT ME! Amen. Anon.
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Blessed Forgiveness ....... Holy Spirit!!!
Today is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be .... glad, and rested. Now that the superbowl is over, no matter who won, let us take time to remember the Lord's day. Whatever animosity you may feel for another person just forget it, and forgive. As they say life is too short to keep up the fighting and/or worrying. Pray for those who curse you, Jesus himself says. That is hard to do. I admit that myself. That's the main reason why I went off, previously, not recognizing that I was placing too much work on my shoulders, and I cracked. The Holy Spirit is real!!! Forgive me, as I forgive you. Amen. Anon. Goodnight! :)
Saturday, January 31, 2015
Who needs another pay check? lmao ..... Ok, so I'm not child safe!
Ok, on a positive note I just got word that my account has been disapproved to run ads on various parts of my page. What that means in the writing world is that my particular audience is so specialized that I may be offensive to the casual reader. I'm heading for the big leagues. What serious writer has ads run through their text anywayz? Only product placement in movies uses this strategy because it makes sense, sort of. They have to be careful to use symbols that fit the movie's time period, setting, and demographic. Kudos to Goo... oops, (can I say their name here?) They have to stand by their guns as I have to tell it like it is.
"But at what cost, David?", you may ask. "You're heading for bankruptcy, you're staying in a house you're not paying for, your dog just died. Could't a little money help. Tone it down, kiss a little ass, brown nos ... eh, well you know what we mean. Just don't say you voted for Obama, and Nagin, and Edwards ... etc." But, the tragedy here is simple to see: If I continued to live someplace that didn't want me, the truth would come out anyway. I'm not gay, not gonna give into that senseless trend just to end up in a fight with a guy lover (although some guys will brutally jump the gun on that point their feelings being hurt). I'm not a criminal, so how am I gonna get any heterosex ... the pussycat, without being a gangstah. As I've so vividly explained at the cost of making money I don't give a damn about the 1950's to 1970's spawned racist standards attempting to refabricate old fashioned Jim Crow into new fashioned Jim Crow. A death sentence is a death sentence, a rat trap is a rat trap. The idiots with the money enough to get people to kiss their asses need to understand a thing or two, and I'm not pulling any punches. I use my right to free speech and my adult freedoms because when I didn't speak up for myself or use my liberties I LOST THEM!!!
I hate to keep rehashing this issue, but "I could have been somebody, I could have been a contender ... ", Marlon Brando from on the Waterfront. And, my St. John Prep coaches were right: I am sorry that I didn't try out for professional sports outside of the pressing need to feed myself in becoming a certified lifeguard. What do you want me to say that hasn't already been said by the lesbian conservatives everytime I enter into their environments as the straight man that I am. I've mentioned the dirty looks from those expecting Ru Paul and instead seeing OJ in me. My body was meant for athletic masculine battle and it smells like it. All my career I've heard that from those sensitive idiots who I'll call the 'male model' protocol. They make no secret that they have 'male model' high standards in grooming, and anyone falling short ... well, you know. I'm not white, I'm not pretty, I smell ... get the impression. The ideal is fine for them to expect, but my straight male expectations are offensive, especially to racists.
So, the clock is gonna tick down this time I'm afraid, and where I'll end up I don't know. I wrote "Forgiveness & Avoiding the Negativity Trap!" to foster development in the right direction. But, then I started thinking about what I'd written myself, scouring the pages, and while it's a good read for those who've probably MADE THE MISTAKES AND KNOW BETTER, it's probably booooooooring to the kids out there (and starting teachers) out there still making the mistakes and getting into fights. Of course, they are gonna complain that no one told them what I've got written in my book. And, they may just pick up on the message from someone else .... plenty of books on forgiveness out there, including the Bible. They just don't want to be preached to, or told what to do, especially today!!! So, see for yourself ... go live life, make mistakes ... then read my book! Ok! Anon!
"But at what cost, David?", you may ask. "You're heading for bankruptcy, you're staying in a house you're not paying for, your dog just died. Could't a little money help. Tone it down, kiss a little ass, brown nos ... eh, well you know what we mean. Just don't say you voted for Obama, and Nagin, and Edwards ... etc." But, the tragedy here is simple to see: If I continued to live someplace that didn't want me, the truth would come out anyway. I'm not gay, not gonna give into that senseless trend just to end up in a fight with a guy lover (although some guys will brutally jump the gun on that point their feelings being hurt). I'm not a criminal, so how am I gonna get any heterosex ... the pussycat, without being a gangstah. As I've so vividly explained at the cost of making money I don't give a damn about the 1950's to 1970's spawned racist standards attempting to refabricate old fashioned Jim Crow into new fashioned Jim Crow. A death sentence is a death sentence, a rat trap is a rat trap. The idiots with the money enough to get people to kiss their asses need to understand a thing or two, and I'm not pulling any punches. I use my right to free speech and my adult freedoms because when I didn't speak up for myself or use my liberties I LOST THEM!!!
I hate to keep rehashing this issue, but "I could have been somebody, I could have been a contender ... ", Marlon Brando from on the Waterfront. And, my St. John Prep coaches were right: I am sorry that I didn't try out for professional sports outside of the pressing need to feed myself in becoming a certified lifeguard. What do you want me to say that hasn't already been said by the lesbian conservatives everytime I enter into their environments as the straight man that I am. I've mentioned the dirty looks from those expecting Ru Paul and instead seeing OJ in me. My body was meant for athletic masculine battle and it smells like it. All my career I've heard that from those sensitive idiots who I'll call the 'male model' protocol. They make no secret that they have 'male model' high standards in grooming, and anyone falling short ... well, you know. I'm not white, I'm not pretty, I smell ... get the impression. The ideal is fine for them to expect, but my straight male expectations are offensive, especially to racists.
So, the clock is gonna tick down this time I'm afraid, and where I'll end up I don't know. I wrote "Forgiveness & Avoiding the Negativity Trap!" to foster development in the right direction. But, then I started thinking about what I'd written myself, scouring the pages, and while it's a good read for those who've probably MADE THE MISTAKES AND KNOW BETTER, it's probably booooooooring to the kids out there (and starting teachers) out there still making the mistakes and getting into fights. Of course, they are gonna complain that no one told them what I've got written in my book. And, they may just pick up on the message from someone else .... plenty of books on forgiveness out there, including the Bible. They just don't want to be preached to, or told what to do, especially today!!! So, see for yourself ... go live life, make mistakes ... then read my book! Ok! Anon!
Friday, January 30, 2015
Thoughts on the Rat Trap revisited ... ;\ Driven Part 2
What would a rat, or any animal or plant in a trap, have to say if it could talk. We, as human beings, have the gift of the Holy Spirit through Jesus. Thus, I'm not quite as trapped as I may be letting on. But, I can still express that which I'm seeing daily, that growing stonewall of useless behavior, especially in those tending toward the feminine persuasion (though not all women) that is supposed to be saving them from their potential abusers. Here's the problem, speaking as the VIRGIN MAN that I am: I find it rediculous that they would use racism to profile me as dangerous to them. For one thing they are only telling all about themselves, and that is what real victimizers look for. So, why do I care anyway? I mean: David you're the VIRGIN MAN, what do you care? Well, it's the NATURE OF THE BEAST, as one racist professor tried to tell me in her class. Let's face it, you are all dropping the ball. Eyeballing a man using old phrenology, i.e., the bumps on his head, the head shape, the color of the skin, etc. surface characteristics that make a guy ugly is not a way of identifying a really dangerous guy. What I believe is going on is that the seducers are filling the heads of their victims with lies to distract from true insidious motives. Time and time again I've seen women fall for these lies because time and time again I've lost enough women to the liars. I HAVE A BODY COUNT: THE WOMEN THAT I LET FALL AWAY FROM ME AND INTO THE ARMS OF THEIR KILLERS. Specifically, these 'kills' involve those women who really berated me, called me 'fag' because I did not once show aggression toward them that a real man would show. My version of the event is that they wanted me to fall into their RAT TRAP and I would not leave my natural soft spoken nature ... did I just admit that. Yes, I'm really cool ... not loud mouthed. For an athlete I'm not proud or haughty. I just went out there, did my job, ran my race, pitched my game, and accepted the results. Although it was indeed 'courtship' oriented for the girls to see as with all male competition, I never proclaimed myself to be a pimp!!!
That's where the trouble began. You see ladies, half of the problem is clearly in YOU!!! YOU!!!YOU!!!YOU criticize a BOYS WILL BE BOYS ethic, but you truly treat men like LITTLE BITCHES when they don't MAN UP! It took me a while to admit it myself, being brainwashed by Alice and her Mel, Good Times and their Bookman, and One Day at a Time with their Schneider (not to mention the Barney Miller episodes that were so hypocritical that I'm nauseated). Only children, boys & girls, could fall for some of the anti-male scripts of the 70's (in particular 3's Company's introduction of networks first gaylike character). Here's the problem, it left a generation of younger people really thinking that MALENESS ITSELF was the problem. Add racism to that mix and you know who's going to be the target of the blame ... ah la OJ if you get my meaning.
But, I will not be driven and here's the reason why: have you looked at the internet lately? From Tula, to Ru Paul, to Chris Crocker one can clearly see it. Women have fallen in love with the ANTIMALE concept, even going so far as to involve themselves only with feminine men. Empathy: that's what they are seeking especially when they have been victimized. However, here's the problem with that plan: When did these feminine entities stop being .... their enemies? There were a few moments in my life where I had been emasculated (racially trying to tell me that women were uncomfortable with me) that I no longer loved myself as a man. I started to form a female personality, a few of them by the way. It took on the form of a physical transformation, and a change in behavior in private at least. Antisocial societies actually make men weird, and as I started to weird out I failed to see that the cause was not in me. Those were the scary years when I actually thought myself to be a hermaphrodite. I actually convinced myself that my masculity was a mistake. But, and this is very personal, as I looked at myself in the mirror one day dressed up like Cher, I saw it. I happened to be lifting weights at the time, in a bikini and long hair and makeup, ... the complete female persona. What I noticed was that the muscle bound freak in the mirror could still snap anyone's neck. That's when I woke up in my apartment in Manhattan Kansas, in graduate school. They'd gotten to me, the isolation, the racism at church, no one to talk to ... I'd finally lost it. I gave myself a name (which I won't mention here), and it was hard to talk myself back to normal ... as per the fact that 'she' wanted to come out and she's a very mean bitch. What a friend ladies!!! And yet women not only seek out this companionship today, but the really stupid ones (in some way) castrate men to become their friends. What's wrong ladies? I'm telling you: you may feel better around a more empathetic and feminine man, but you don't have the right to make a man that way. Driving, driving, driving, driving ...... until ....... well read my previous blog on 'going a little crazy sometimes'!! Holy Spiritual prayer is constant from me. The dirty looks from those who know that I'm straight in Walgreens, in Walmart, at the bank, it's not gay women happy to be with each other. It's very scared people eyeing me like identifying my masculinity, my chosen condition, like I should be something else. All I can do is look at them and ask: How many of them have died at the hands of that gay best friend? For you guys who are really gay and good friends with people I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU!!! I'M TALKING ABOUT THE SICKNESS OF ANTI-MALE RACIST HATE!!! I'm praying for you all. Anon.
That's where the trouble began. You see ladies, half of the problem is clearly in YOU!!! YOU!!!YOU!!!YOU criticize a BOYS WILL BE BOYS ethic, but you truly treat men like LITTLE BITCHES when they don't MAN UP! It took me a while to admit it myself, being brainwashed by Alice and her Mel, Good Times and their Bookman, and One Day at a Time with their Schneider (not to mention the Barney Miller episodes that were so hypocritical that I'm nauseated). Only children, boys & girls, could fall for some of the anti-male scripts of the 70's (in particular 3's Company's introduction of networks first gaylike character). Here's the problem, it left a generation of younger people really thinking that MALENESS ITSELF was the problem. Add racism to that mix and you know who's going to be the target of the blame ... ah la OJ if you get my meaning.
But, I will not be driven and here's the reason why: have you looked at the internet lately? From Tula, to Ru Paul, to Chris Crocker one can clearly see it. Women have fallen in love with the ANTIMALE concept, even going so far as to involve themselves only with feminine men. Empathy: that's what they are seeking especially when they have been victimized. However, here's the problem with that plan: When did these feminine entities stop being .... their enemies? There were a few moments in my life where I had been emasculated (racially trying to tell me that women were uncomfortable with me) that I no longer loved myself as a man. I started to form a female personality, a few of them by the way. It took on the form of a physical transformation, and a change in behavior in private at least. Antisocial societies actually make men weird, and as I started to weird out I failed to see that the cause was not in me. Those were the scary years when I actually thought myself to be a hermaphrodite. I actually convinced myself that my masculity was a mistake. But, and this is very personal, as I looked at myself in the mirror one day dressed up like Cher, I saw it. I happened to be lifting weights at the time, in a bikini and long hair and makeup, ... the complete female persona. What I noticed was that the muscle bound freak in the mirror could still snap anyone's neck. That's when I woke up in my apartment in Manhattan Kansas, in graduate school. They'd gotten to me, the isolation, the racism at church, no one to talk to ... I'd finally lost it. I gave myself a name (which I won't mention here), and it was hard to talk myself back to normal ... as per the fact that 'she' wanted to come out and she's a very mean bitch. What a friend ladies!!! And yet women not only seek out this companionship today, but the really stupid ones (in some way) castrate men to become their friends. What's wrong ladies? I'm telling you: you may feel better around a more empathetic and feminine man, but you don't have the right to make a man that way. Driving, driving, driving, driving ...... until ....... well read my previous blog on 'going a little crazy sometimes'!! Holy Spiritual prayer is constant from me. The dirty looks from those who know that I'm straight in Walgreens, in Walmart, at the bank, it's not gay women happy to be with each other. It's very scared people eyeing me like identifying my masculinity, my chosen condition, like I should be something else. All I can do is look at them and ask: How many of them have died at the hands of that gay best friend? For you guys who are really gay and good friends with people I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU!!! I'M TALKING ABOUT THE SICKNESS OF ANTI-MALE RACIST HATE!!! I'm praying for you all. Anon.
Why not play sports professionally??? The Explanation, praise the Holy Spirit!!!
First of all let me sooth you guys, I'm really not crazy as I may 'sound'. After all I'm just typing what I am feeling before I go backrupt. I'm just counting the days now before my last paycheck from the job I quit from that two job situation. That leaves me with only one job and living in a cold drafty house that I'm not paying for. My former public school students used a word that befits my predicament: DRIVING, OR DROVE, AS they put it. The let down in life is that I was made aware that there are more crazy adults influencing the same DRIVING antics that the kids had.
They never use the proper pronunciation, DRIVEN, but they (the kids and adults) nailed the meaning on me all day long. It was very bad because of consequences paid for their own choices. Many of the kids, despite their gifts and intelligence, chose a life of crime that I, at the time, could not see their reasoning for. I was above that. To make a long story short, as I approach homelessness and bankruptcy, I can sort of see the reason for their desperation. For all those who knew me as an athlete and singer at St. John Vianney you may have wondered why I didn't major in music, art, or athletics in college finishing my high school program. Well, my father was a product of the depression segregation era. Being so, he was a SEVERELY INTIMIDATED MAN and abused to his heart when it came to certain issues, specifically those offending white people. Dave Chappelle talks about his 'black power' father in his comedy. Well, my father was just the opposite, he hated integration. Like so many he felt that 'niggers' had lost a vital place in society due to integration. He frequently dropped civil rights leader's names with disgust. Thus, anything that offended white people he hated, including points of my development.
I often mentioned to him that I wanted to continue with my sports, music, & art endeavors ... the things that I had proven to be good at. But, he being a loud mouthed criminal would put me down with the mention of each of those proven successful areas. He was criminally schizoprenic and had commited crimes in his childhood. But, the worst one was an assault on my mother when I was a child. This ended their marriage then and should have been the final curtain. But, she let him back in the door after my brother was nearly killed in an auto accident thinking we needed his authority, I guess. Under her guidance I started playing baseball, pursued art, and even started playing guitar and pursued music theory. My father, moreover, graduated at Xavier in music with a bachelors, but, as he put it, his jacked up nerves were too bad to be employed. He was a skilled musician, brilliant ... but, there was already a Robert Johnson in the music world; and, with him being paranoid schizophrenic it messed him up mentally to be compared with the other one.
He played the role of the dutiful father buying sports equipment and even computer systems and books to read. But, the man was a product of segregation and the depression. His mind was swiss cheese. You had to look at people's faces to tell you what side of the street to walk on. Racists posted signs as to what water fountains you could use and bathrooms were off limits. What people fail to realize is that laws may change, but that training IS STILL A PART OF MANY WHO EXPERIENCED IT. Therefore, what Jackie Robinson, Hank Aaron, and Jesse Owens did was UNHEARD OF, and I got an earfull of it everyday. He was at once proud of it, but fearful for anyone who tried to duplicate the success. I heard the chorus of such racist hits like 'bow wow on the prowl' and 'the monkey played the fiddle on the sweet potato vine' daily. Not only that, but I got the nickname that I came to hate ... BOBBEE, a true bastardization of the name Bobbie. The story is that he hated the concept of junior, and the mention of his brothers James, Jr. and Edward, Jr. made him hollar something fierce. But, he had no problem with giving me his own nickname from childhood, thus directly using the concept of junior, only with that more 'ee' feminine twist. In short, there came a time when my shoulders got too broad and my balls started to descend, my voice had that famous BASS in it, and when hair showed up on my face and old school parents see that as trespassing on their territory. What's more, you know I was the Michael Evans militant of the house. As I started to express my adulthood and points of view I was often told I was pissing on the wall and smelling it, in some form or fashion. Sound familiar?
Little did I realize that a large part of our society is still partial to this abuse, not seeing anything at all wrong with it when it comes to responding in fear to black men today. But, I finally figured out what was scaring my dad: I was too good at anything I set my mind to, and I often brought home nightmarish stories about what I'd experienced in the mostly white environment of SJP. What he could see, and often heard, was complaints about my performance level, competing too hard. I'd started out a freshman on the baseball team at SJP performing on the senior level back in 1982. By the time I was a senior those skills had been eroded due to frequent arguments about whether I would pursue sports on the college level. I think my dad was intimidated by what he heard behind the scenes from various parents who's children I struck out, typical things racists say about blacks who perform too well. Thus, as my body peaked, he discouraged me from going any further in sports (and similarly in music and art.) The white boys have all the resources and the skills in everything. But, he and my brother hogged the computer and that became 'their thing' ... and they left me behind to pursue what I can only describe as that criminal lifestyle associated with militants, street thugs, 'my friends' outside with our 'sexual talking'. Mind you I don't hate my father, but imagine a man bringing home his (typical victim) abuse in the army and other racist institutions unabashed not knowing what it was. His favorite device was 'the little king who couldn't see the forest for the trees'. I was that king. Another device used socially is the word 'chief', denoted the deposed dead racial chiefs who had their countries taken from them.
So, what's this have to do with the Holy Spirit or Obama? Even though I'm quite long winded (explaining too much), I had to use the power of forgiveness from the Holy Spirit to pursue a next course of action. That is, being barred from sports, music, and art I majored in Physics/Engineering ... starting out very poorly of course because I'd put all of my eggs in the other baskets (art, music, sports). It took me a long while to become proficient in advanced math and the sciences to survive finally graduating from Xavier University, La. and making into Kansas State University graduating from there in Physics education. I then returned to La. teaching in the private school system first (with some social problems), then switching to the public school system, getting another masters degree (M.A.) in Curriculum and instruction and my Louisiana High School teaching certification, 160017, and getting recertified as a lifeguard. Then, after difficult years getting though to generation X as a teacher with its ghetto pop cultural points, I decided to go on leave in 2005 (just after having a bout with pnuemonia). Katrina struck and that ended my leave, we all got fired (which I did not know), and I ended up in Rapides parish (Tioga Jr. High School) teaching again (and in no shape to do so). All the while I prayed my way through each incident. I was obese and out of shape by that time and didn't know I had high blood pressure. But, I still prayed. When I went back to New Orleans advised not to do so and worked in television, I still prayed. Through the Saints' Superbowl victory and the election of President Obama I gave thanks to God (ever notice that everyone responsible for the Saints/New Orleans recovery was punished or went to jail?)! The Holy Spirit has been with me, however, all this time.
So, finally after being laid off from television and opting not to continue with year round status as a lifeguard I ended up a Vinson Security Guard working over night (again) and a tutor at Delgado Community College. Well, I couldn't keep working the 12 straight hours at Vinson I needed to get fully paid, so I let that go. So, now I'm waiting for my final pay check from Vinson knowing that my Delgado Check is not going to pay the bills. Bankruptcy looms as I wait for my book revenue to start counting. So, whatever happens next, I've at least told someone my story, again. We'll just have to see.
They never use the proper pronunciation, DRIVEN, but they (the kids and adults) nailed the meaning on me all day long. It was very bad because of consequences paid for their own choices. Many of the kids, despite their gifts and intelligence, chose a life of crime that I, at the time, could not see their reasoning for. I was above that. To make a long story short, as I approach homelessness and bankruptcy, I can sort of see the reason for their desperation. For all those who knew me as an athlete and singer at St. John Vianney you may have wondered why I didn't major in music, art, or athletics in college finishing my high school program. Well, my father was a product of the depression segregation era. Being so, he was a SEVERELY INTIMIDATED MAN and abused to his heart when it came to certain issues, specifically those offending white people. Dave Chappelle talks about his 'black power' father in his comedy. Well, my father was just the opposite, he hated integration. Like so many he felt that 'niggers' had lost a vital place in society due to integration. He frequently dropped civil rights leader's names with disgust. Thus, anything that offended white people he hated, including points of my development.
I often mentioned to him that I wanted to continue with my sports, music, & art endeavors ... the things that I had proven to be good at. But, he being a loud mouthed criminal would put me down with the mention of each of those proven successful areas. He was criminally schizoprenic and had commited crimes in his childhood. But, the worst one was an assault on my mother when I was a child. This ended their marriage then and should have been the final curtain. But, she let him back in the door after my brother was nearly killed in an auto accident thinking we needed his authority, I guess. Under her guidance I started playing baseball, pursued art, and even started playing guitar and pursued music theory. My father, moreover, graduated at Xavier in music with a bachelors, but, as he put it, his jacked up nerves were too bad to be employed. He was a skilled musician, brilliant ... but, there was already a Robert Johnson in the music world; and, with him being paranoid schizophrenic it messed him up mentally to be compared with the other one.
He played the role of the dutiful father buying sports equipment and even computer systems and books to read. But, the man was a product of segregation and the depression. His mind was swiss cheese. You had to look at people's faces to tell you what side of the street to walk on. Racists posted signs as to what water fountains you could use and bathrooms were off limits. What people fail to realize is that laws may change, but that training IS STILL A PART OF MANY WHO EXPERIENCED IT. Therefore, what Jackie Robinson, Hank Aaron, and Jesse Owens did was UNHEARD OF, and I got an earfull of it everyday. He was at once proud of it, but fearful for anyone who tried to duplicate the success. I heard the chorus of such racist hits like 'bow wow on the prowl' and 'the monkey played the fiddle on the sweet potato vine' daily. Not only that, but I got the nickname that I came to hate ... BOBBEE, a true bastardization of the name Bobbie. The story is that he hated the concept of junior, and the mention of his brothers James, Jr. and Edward, Jr. made him hollar something fierce. But, he had no problem with giving me his own nickname from childhood, thus directly using the concept of junior, only with that more 'ee' feminine twist. In short, there came a time when my shoulders got too broad and my balls started to descend, my voice had that famous BASS in it, and when hair showed up on my face and old school parents see that as trespassing on their territory. What's more, you know I was the Michael Evans militant of the house. As I started to express my adulthood and points of view I was often told I was pissing on the wall and smelling it, in some form or fashion. Sound familiar?
Little did I realize that a large part of our society is still partial to this abuse, not seeing anything at all wrong with it when it comes to responding in fear to black men today. But, I finally figured out what was scaring my dad: I was too good at anything I set my mind to, and I often brought home nightmarish stories about what I'd experienced in the mostly white environment of SJP. What he could see, and often heard, was complaints about my performance level, competing too hard. I'd started out a freshman on the baseball team at SJP performing on the senior level back in 1982. By the time I was a senior those skills had been eroded due to frequent arguments about whether I would pursue sports on the college level. I think my dad was intimidated by what he heard behind the scenes from various parents who's children I struck out, typical things racists say about blacks who perform too well. Thus, as my body peaked, he discouraged me from going any further in sports (and similarly in music and art.) The white boys have all the resources and the skills in everything. But, he and my brother hogged the computer and that became 'their thing' ... and they left me behind to pursue what I can only describe as that criminal lifestyle associated with militants, street thugs, 'my friends' outside with our 'sexual talking'. Mind you I don't hate my father, but imagine a man bringing home his (typical victim) abuse in the army and other racist institutions unabashed not knowing what it was. His favorite device was 'the little king who couldn't see the forest for the trees'. I was that king. Another device used socially is the word 'chief', denoted the deposed dead racial chiefs who had their countries taken from them.
So, what's this have to do with the Holy Spirit or Obama? Even though I'm quite long winded (explaining too much), I had to use the power of forgiveness from the Holy Spirit to pursue a next course of action. That is, being barred from sports, music, and art I majored in Physics/Engineering ... starting out very poorly of course because I'd put all of my eggs in the other baskets (art, music, sports). It took me a long while to become proficient in advanced math and the sciences to survive finally graduating from Xavier University, La. and making into Kansas State University graduating from there in Physics education. I then returned to La. teaching in the private school system first (with some social problems), then switching to the public school system, getting another masters degree (M.A.) in Curriculum and instruction and my Louisiana High School teaching certification, 160017, and getting recertified as a lifeguard. Then, after difficult years getting though to generation X as a teacher with its ghetto pop cultural points, I decided to go on leave in 2005 (just after having a bout with pnuemonia). Katrina struck and that ended my leave, we all got fired (which I did not know), and I ended up in Rapides parish (Tioga Jr. High School) teaching again (and in no shape to do so). All the while I prayed my way through each incident. I was obese and out of shape by that time and didn't know I had high blood pressure. But, I still prayed. When I went back to New Orleans advised not to do so and worked in television, I still prayed. Through the Saints' Superbowl victory and the election of President Obama I gave thanks to God (ever notice that everyone responsible for the Saints/New Orleans recovery was punished or went to jail?)! The Holy Spirit has been with me, however, all this time.
So, finally after being laid off from television and opting not to continue with year round status as a lifeguard I ended up a Vinson Security Guard working over night (again) and a tutor at Delgado Community College. Well, I couldn't keep working the 12 straight hours at Vinson I needed to get fully paid, so I let that go. So, now I'm waiting for my final pay check from Vinson knowing that my Delgado Check is not going to pay the bills. Bankruptcy looms as I wait for my book revenue to start counting. So, whatever happens next, I've at least told someone my story, again. We'll just have to see.
Thursday, January 29, 2015
This one's for you ... you know who ... ;)
I have this pedophile/racist acquaintance who I met some time ago, actually quite recently. I broke his heart by not showing interest in him. I'm not gay and I didn't appreciate the racism. He kept alluding to the notion that he was the only one who like me, and most women don't. He even went so far as to hook me up with a racist lesbian friend of his just to break my heart. Every time I tried something after I rejected his advances he and his cronies would put my 'efforts' down, brutally. I had to ask him: Is this love? I mean, who would or could really like you if this is how you act toward your intended lovers?! What's your problem? His response was to condescend to me for acting like he described as a 'big child'. So, he would say, "big child, what's your next move? next failure ..." My only consolation was that I was not this fools lover. I'm not judgemental about others' relationships or orientations. But, he just didn't get it. It finally cost me my job, he'd poisoned the environment against me. I don't see why I have to be another gay man to defend myself. It seems that standing your ground as a straight male doesn't mean a thing anymore. My next move, another failure, another failure, and another effort ... until I'm heard. I know for a fact that he was finally caught ... by his own group. He'd hurt his last victim. Does it have to come to this every time? ~~ Forgiven
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